Unleash Your Talents: Discover and Make Friends with Your Inner Saboteur

For those who missed this fabulous workshop here are the highlights from “Discover and Make Friends with Your Inner Saboteur” brought to us by Lydia Haferburg on February 25th, 2020 at the INC

We started the workshop with a story told by George Bernard Shaw: “Inside of me there are two dogs. One of the dogs is mean and evil. The other dog is good. The mean dog fights the good dog all the time. When asked which dog wins, I found out: The one I feed the most.”

The first step of the workshop was the discovery of our Saboteur, who is lurking in the dark corners of everybody’s psyche, with a mandate to keep us playing small, hidden away from our dreams, from living to our fullest potential, from being vulnerable, powerful and authentic.

We explored the ways of how to recognize the Saboteur and familiarize ourselves with its functioning. Frequently it talks to us with sayings such as: I’m not worthy, I’m not capable, I will lose respect, I will let them down, I will disappoint them, I will hurt them, I should put others first…

We found out under what circumstances your Saboteur becomes active. This is mostly when we move from planning to action, after a phase of dreaming and planning. This is the moment when we begin to leave the cave of comfort, when we walk away from the status quo and go towards a new target. We leave the saboteur’s grip and if we are not careful, we will allow its voice of desperation to sabotage our dreams. In our working environment, this is when we want to speak out our truth, or to ask for a higher position/salary.

We managed to draw a picture of the Saboteur and to give it a name – we had some “mother Theresa”, some “monsters”, some “little brave girls”… We heard the voice of our mothers, fathers, teachers, husbands…telling us that “we are not ready yet, not slim/beautiful enough….”

It was good to share and to hear that everybody had a similar experience. This helped us to accept that the Saboteur makes a part of us and to develop compassion with him, instead of being angry at him. Recognizing its intention or purpose will help in the future to stay calm, out of reactivity and to make a new empowering choice.

We finished the workshop by questioning our Saboteur’s beliefs/sayings.

For example:

I will disappoint them. = False.

What is the truth?

They will be perfectly fine; they will be able to handle my decision. = A new empowering belief.

To summarize how to tame our saboteur, here are the 8 ways at a glance:

1. Simply notice your Saboteur.
2. Familiarize yourself with its favorite sayings.
3. Notice under what circumstances your Saboteur speaks the loudest.
4. Be curious about who your Saboteur sounds like.
5. Draw a picture of your Saboteur.
6. Question your Saboteur’s beliefs/sayings.
7. Have compassion for your Saboteur.
8. Practice

And finally: how to feed the right dog?

• Feed your intuition, values and dreams and you empower your Self.

• Feed your fears and you empower your Saboteur, and the Saboteurs of other people.

Thank you to the participants to have been courageous and took the path of detecting their saboteur, it was so much easier to unleash it in group dynamics!

I am delighted to have had the opportunity to contribute to the development of my fellow PWN members.

Thank you also for your participating to the cocktail, giving us an opportunity to maintain and to create networks and relationships.

At last but not least, thanks to the organizing team (Christine and Alex) and to our Sponsor, L’Institut de Cognitivisme.

Lydia Haferburg

Lydia.haferburg@wanadoo.fr

+33 (0) 6 31 48 67 35

https://inbalance.fr

https://www.linkedin.com/in/lydiahaferburg/

For more information on the PWN Paris Develop programme 2019-2020, please contact:

Romaine Johnstone, VP Develop PWN Paris

rjohnstone.pwnparis@gmail.com - +33 (0)6 64 27 29 07

Christine Mourgues Bastide

cmourguesb@gmail.com

The PWN DEVELOP - Unleash Your Talents workshops for 2019/2020 are kindly hosted by our partner the INC - Institut du Neurocognitivisme.

Thank you to Pierre Moorkens and his team for their support and to PWN member Muriel Janoir Bessioud for making it happen.